


Prisoner

by mayawrites95 (mayarox95)



Series: A Light In The Darkness [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Fix-It, Kylo Ren Redemption, Redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-17 04:08:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13068810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mayarox95/pseuds/mayawrites95
Summary: Ben is left to contemplate his actions after turning his back on the First Order. Rey gives him some company.





	Prisoner

He’s locked up less than an hour after his arrival onto the Resistance ship. One moment, his mother is hugging him tightly, sobbing over his return while he stood there, awkwardly, and the next, a Resistance officer is whispering in his mother’s ear.

He can see her face get tense, looking unhappy by the course of action she’s about to take. He pulls away, looking to Rey.

In all honesty, he hadn’t thought about what would happen after he left the First Order. What would happen after he decided to leave it behind and go back to the Resistance, to his family.

Rey gives him a small smile, but he knows deep down she’s as worried as he is. He wasn’t just an First Order officer, like the traitor Stormtrooper who grew a conscious. He was the second in line to Snoke, the one who slayed the Jedi who refused to join him, and ran off to Snoke. The one who gave the order to kill their friends and family, the one who shot some of them down himself. He wasn’t a good person, and in all honesty, it was why he wasn’t surprised when his mother took out a set energy cuffs.

She looked pained as she held it out to her son, and Ben understood instantly. He was still a threat to everyone on the ship, and for all they knew, he could kill them all with the use of his lightsaber.

He handed it to Rey, and she silently took it from him, seeming pained at doing so, before holding his wrists out to his mother.

“I’m sorry,” Leia said softly, as she placed them around him. “We’ll hear you out, fairly,” she promised him. “Let you tell your story.”

“I understand,” he said, giving her a soft smile. He knew it wouldn’t be easy coming back home. He still needed to be held accountable for his crimes, and face the punishment he deserved. It was what was fair. He couldn’t expect to waltz back into their base and expect for things to be back to what they were before.

Not that he knew what before was, exactly. All his life, all he ever was, was the son of a diplomatic General and a Smuggler. Then he was a padawan. He never actually held a place with the Resistance, nor did he have anywhere he belonged to return to.

He walked, as his mother led him to the brig, where he would remain until his trial. He watched as the doors closed in front of him, leaving him inside the tiny cell.

He’s unsure of how long he’ll be there for, and when he’ll be given a trial. He assumes it won’t be a while. The Resistance need time to regroup, to find a new base, to reach out to their allies, and to gather themselves. He’s not exactly high priority by any standards. Not when they finally escaped the First Order, who spend the better part of the last little while tracking the Rebels through the galaxy as they jumped through hyperspace. No, for now their safety was critical. He was secondary.

What he is surprised about, however, is that Rey comes to visit him, a little less than an hour after he’s been locked up. He assumes that she would have come sooner, but was forced to debrief about her mission to find Luke, and the exact details of what happened aboard _The Supremacy_.

She’s holding a tray of food, and gives him a gentle smile, as she begins arguing with the guard outside her door. He assumes it to be about her safety as she’s about to be locked into a room with a notorious war criminal, which could only put her in danger.

He has a force suppression collar on, which makes him feel oddly cut off from the galaxy, from Rey, and from his family. It’s not painful, not in any ways that actually hurt. But he feels different, and he’s not all that sure he likes it.

Really, the only way he could hurt Rey is physically, if he really wanted to. But the thought is enough to make him feel sick. There was a time when all he wanted to do was crush her, to make her bend before him, to make her hurt.

But that quickly shifted. He wanted to possess her, to have her by him, and to have her join him.

But Rey is too full of life and energy. Too pure. She could never be captured or restrained.

“I brought you some food to eat,” she said, as the door opened. He gives her a smile, as she places the tray beside her. Food had been the last thing on his mind, but now that the tray was in front of him, he was suddenly ravenous.

It’s not the most generous plate of food; definitely nothing like he ate while as a high officer of the First Order. He knows the Resistance runs off rations, and as a prisoner, he was the lowest priority. Not when they had members fighting every day.

She sits down beside him, and when he doesn’t offer any words of his own, she begins to talk. She tells him of her time on Jakku. How she used to sell scraps of the ship she was living on for food. How she marked day after day, waiting for the one where her parents would return.

He doesn’t know why she’s telling him this. They’re barely friends. But then, he tried to convince her to join the Dark Side and rule the universe with him.

There’s something about her, something in her, that he desperately needs. She’s like the warmth of the suns on his skin after a long winter. He needs her, and he doesn’t know what it is he’s feeling. He’s never needed someone as desperately as he needs her.

His father was always too busy, going on trip after trip across the galaxy. And his mother, a Senator, had more important things to do on a daily basis. Luke always expected him to be great. That his accomplishments were expected, not achievements.

And to all of them, he felt like he was just there. That he belonged because he existed, but that it probably wouldn’t make a difference if he didn’t. He was raised more by the droids C3PO and others than he was by his family.

He wanted them to be in his life, to be there as the other parents were, but he never needed them. Not like he needs Rey.

She’s rambling on now, telling him how the traitor (well he supposed he shouldn’t call him that now, not when he’s one too) Finn, and the girl Rose, went to Canto Bight, trying to find some hacker to help them onto the ship. It should worry him, that it was so easy for them to fake their way onto _The Supremacy_ , but he supposes it’s their saving grace, in the end.

She’s there for a few hours, before he finally speaks. She makes the cell feel less lonely, and he is grateful for her presence. Her voice is soothing, and he could listen to her talk for hours.

“You don’t need to stay,” he tells her softly, “I deserve to be here. You don’t.”

“I want to be,” she says, shrugging. “Even if all you do is brood, I want to stay here with you.”

“You could be out there,” he points out. He knows they landed already, at whatever planet they’re inhabiting now, and the rest of the Resistance is slowly setting up in their new home. She’s lived on Jakku, and he knows she hasn’t been to too many other planets. He’s sure wherever they are is beautiful enough to make her face light up brightly in amazement, and he doesn’t want to take that away from her.

“There’s plenty of time to see what’s out there,” she shrugs.

“Why?” he asked, after a few moments of silence. “Why would you choose to sit in here with me?”

“Because I want to,” she says, moving so she’s sitting beside him on the bed. “Maybe I like your company.”

“I’m hardy good company,” he scoffed, in disbelief.

“I know,” she says, laughing softly. “Look, I convinced you to leave. I told you it was all going to be okay. That I would be by your side through it all. I’m hardly going to leave you in here alone after you sacrificed so much to be here. Despite how hard it was for you.”

He feels touched by her genuineness. She could have convinced him to leave, then left him in here to rot. After all, without him and Snoke, the First Order is left vulnerable to attacks. It could have been her objective to destabilize them. Instead, she wanted to redeem him because she believed in him.

She takes his hands in hers. He’s no longer shackled now that he has the force suppression collar on him.

“You deserve better,” he whispers, as he holds her hands in his. Somehow, touching her in person, and not through their force bond, feels better than anything he could have imagined.

“Maybe,” she shrugs, “But I want to be in here with you.”

She’s probably singlehandedly the most frustrating person he’s ever met, but at the same time, he wants nothing more than to hold her in his arms, and as selfish as he is, he wants her to stay in here with him.

“Thank you,” he says softly.

He tries to be better company. To offer her conversation in return. He can tell she appreciates it, and he makes her smile a few times.

The guard eventually kicks her out, as they get closer to the night.

He’s taken off the ship the next day, locked up in a new cell. But it doesn’t stop Rey from visiting, day after day, and making sure he’s never alone for too long.

It wasn’t going to be easy. He had no idea how long he would be locked up for before a trial, or even what would happen to him after one. For all he knew, he would be locked up for the rest of his life, not that it was any less than he deserved. But at least knowing Rey was here, that she was proud of his choices, and that she cared enough about him to make sure he was okay, was more than enough for him.


End file.
